Our girl came home today totally devastated. Some jerky boys at school decided to single this beautiful girl out and say some very unpleasant things. What should I do? Input please!
Mantra:
People Suck!!
Oh, and the sewing machine? I figured out the issue... it is possessed!!
Please send someone to exercise it!
7 comments:
Ah yes...high school jerks. Mackenzie is in 10th grade,and Tiff is a senior. I always instinctively want to get involved and call parents, or go with to school, or tell somebody who can fix it...but after sleeping it off, I realize I'm teaching these kids to become people who can fend for themselves in the world soon. Reassure her, love her, let her deal with it no matter how hard it is for you. Trust me. I KNOW what it's like, and it will end up better in the end. :)
Bullies suck (sorry for the strong language!) Depending on how your daughter is feeling about it, you could do one or both of 2 things. She could talk to a teacher about it (that's our job!) Especially if these boys do it often- or what Alli said- she could rely on the love of her family and friends and realize that bullies are just sad, sad people themselves who have low self esteem and do these things just to get attention. Talk to her about how she wants to handle it. I so agree about what Alli said about raising kids to deal with issues on their own. But sometimes Bullies need to be sent a message. That things like this aren't allowed in school. Keep me posted on how things are going.
Hang in there Mel. I will keep you guys in my prayers. I agree that she needs to attempt to deal with it on her own but keep a close eye on it. You just don't know what these bullies are capable of. I've had a few similar situations with Becca and have offered to step in but she didn't want me to and she got thru it and learned so much.
Love you Mel!! Keep me posted.
Well, I have mixed feelings about the bullying. Yes, as mama bears we want to fend off any danger and evil that could come to our cubs. That's instinct. But we can't ALWAYS go to their rescue prematurely. I don't know what the age is when you let your children try to fight their own battles but I'm guessing it's right around teenage years. Jordy Boom is a teenager now and knows right from wrong. She knows they're being a bunch of a-holes but it still affects her self image. All you can do is reinforce the good things to her. Tell her how pretty she is, how proud of her you are, etc. Yes, it's sickening hearing it from your parents and you start to question their sincerity, but nonetheless a person still needs to hear it. After while those comments sink in and stick somewhere in our brains and we get a glimmer of hope that believes it. Repetition is the best method for lots of things!
And after hearing about those boys bullying my beautiful niece who is absolutely wonderful, inside and out, I wanted to go and give them MAJOR WEDGIES and hang them upside down until they admitted how beautiful she really is and that secretly they adore and like her but don't know how to convey those feelings yet. Thus, being immature a-holes about it to get the attention they so want from her. Remember, attention is attention a lot of the time and it doesn't matter if it's negative or positive.
Okay, I'm off my soap box. I just may message Jordy this comment. She could use to hear it from as many people as possible. I don't want her believing for a SECOND that these guys have any grounds to call her what they did. I love that girl I tell ya! And wish I could do some damage control physically but that's not the answer in the end. Sha Sha Boom will prevail!!!
I agree with letting her handle it. But We know that the boom is sensitive, so yeah tell her shes lovely... but you can also see that her friends know and are telling her that too.
She knows they're incredibly stupid and mainly she just needs to ignore them -even when they want that negative attention. That may be the hardest thing to do for a 14 yr old, they think everyone's watching them, and want everyone's approval... but she needs to start to learn that both of those thoughts don't matter. You're the one that's watching yourself more than anyone else and all you need is your own motivation and self approval to succeed. She knows she's pretty or she wouldn't primp herself in front of the mirror for hours, she just may need a reminder from you and friends now and then.
I have a mantra for you...Mind over matter, if you don't mind it doesn't matter. I guess what I'm trying to say is that those that truly care about your daughter, and those that are worthy of her caring, would never treat her as such. So those that are doing this are not worth her time. I know it is truly hard to let that go sometimes. And as parents we want to fix everything, but sometimes our involvement can make it worse instead of better. If she is anything like her Mama, she is a wonderful person & tell her I said so!
Hey Mel, I agree with what everyone has said. And dealing with it as a family is so much better. The only thing I would add is that teachers unfortunately don't hear everything and if no one ever let's them know- these icky bullies keep on doing their thing. Please keep us posted!
Post a Comment